Forecasts for the 2005 BMGA season

A none too serious look at the season to come

A tough year of competitive minigolf ahead, but who do you see as the players to watch out for?

The table below shows the tournaments and confirmed dates.

Tim Davies (World Crazy Golf Champion (again), Britain's number 3 (yeah right) and Emperor of Planet Hastings Crazy Golf Club) says:

In my own eyes I'm still rightfully number 1 and although once more the thought of retirement looms large I've decided to regain my throne and make you all pay, in wasted sweat and tears. Once more unto the beach. I ended the regular season in spanking form and will continue this into 2005. Who are the realistic challengers, well there aren't any so I wont bother highlighting any names. Ted will continue to play a member of the supporting cast as will the rest of you. One more competition is within my grasp now as a Senior. Eat my thermal vest.  The gulf in technique continues to grow, the ones I respect continues to shorten, only Steve Gow and Keith Kellard have the necessaries.  They will come good, who cares about the rest.  Well, I do, only the Bullins show the wherewithall to learn and to grow, some think they know more than the proven veterans but they remain and always will, might-have-beens.

Ted McIver (British Masters Champion and Britain's number 4 (yeah right)) says:

Like Uma Thurman's character in Kill Bill, Ace man Davies will eviscerate everything and everyone in 2005.
Imagine if you will the destructive power of the daleks multiplied by the chaos of the Borg, sprinkle in the carnage of "Battle Royale" and add annihilation and this will give you an inkling of the Juggernaught coming your way.
2005 will see fewer players taking part in these competitions, either because they're fed up with his "winning is everything" philosophy, his BABBA (bad attitude,bad body aroma), his one man war on the Executive committee or the simple fact that no one in this country is fit to play on the same minigolf course as this Planet Hastings demi god demigogue.
Since the London based plots stripped the Hastings maestro of his beloved position as British number one he has brooded, bawled, bellowed, bled, blasphemed and slowly curdled in self pity.
He will be a bitter bad ass baleful opponent upon the putting surfaces of England.
Someone has to pay for the indignities piled upon him, that will be anyone foolish enough to pick up putter and ball and walk upon the same minigolf course as Davies.
Davies is willing to sacrifice his home, his career, his kids, his girlfriend, his friend, just to regain the top lollipop position -do you, dear reader, possess that dedication and determination??
The top eight players to watch:

1)Tim Davies loath him or loath him you can't ignore him-unfortunately
2)Will Eagar- if only he would stop going out to pubs, art galleries, cinemas, clubs and parties and knuckle down to a life of minigolf, he could be the one to make Tim eat my words
3)Jo Vallory the George Best of minigolf-so much talent but too many Miss Worlds and buckets of champagne
4) Chris from Stratford. If he ever turns up again this boy could go all the way
5)Peter Parr-will his self imposed rest make him hungrier or rustier-we wait to see-needs more self belief
6)J Angel-winning the players championship will have given him more confidence, can he maintain the momentum of 2004 I believe he can
7)K Kellard -needs to break his play off hoodoo -solid player but needs another season to toughen up-the Tottenham Hotspur of minigolf plays attractive stuff but makes needless mistakes
8) M Webb Britains number one the big cheese, the next Don McPhee, it would be crass for me to dare to criticise, or comment on any aspect of his game so I won't. Needs to work on his public image and relations with the British press

Steve Gow (British International team player) says:

As someone once said "the king is dead, long live the king."
Rather than evaluate the players and how good they are, I have gone for a less scientific approach and made my predictions using a random number generator and where players finished in last seasons rankings.
Makes for some interesting reading.  So by the looks of it "The new king is dead, resurrect the old king, long live the king."

Keith Kellard (British International team player and Britain's number 5) says:

Planet Hastings Crazy Golf Club Open (results)

On all four Hastings courses.

Previous results: 

2004  1. Ted McIver 2. T Davies 3. S Gow (4 courses)

2003  1. Tim Davies  2. Mr. Michael Webb  3. Ted McIver (4 courses)

2002  1. Ted McIver  2. Tim Davies  3. Mr. Michael Webb (3 courses)

2001  1. Mark Spry 2. Ted McIver  3. Tim Davies  (2 courses)

Clambers BMGA record 28, Tim Davies

Seafront Crazy Golf  BMGA record 32, Brad Shepherd, Ted McIver & Tim Davies

Seafront mini golf BMGA record 33, Tim Davies

Seafront Adventure Golf BMGA record 37, Ian Parker, Mr. Michael Webb & Tim Davies

Ted McIver says:
(incorporating Albert Steptoes "presents")
This is like Schumacher in formulae one as Davies powers past his opponents -let somebody else win Tim for gawds sake.
1)Davies 2)Webb 3)McIver S Gow to win the Dalek biscuit barrel, UFO interceptor, lava lamp, case of beer, hat and flight tickets to Prague*(for more details see www.miniaturegolfer.com ) beware geeks bearing gifts

Keith Kellard says:
I would have won this in 2004. I will win it in 2005! After a play off!!!
1.  Tim Davies 2. Steve Gow  3. J McIver (revised when he found he couldn't make it as it was his partners birthday - Doh)

[Result: 1) T Davies 2) J McIver 3) Ruth Bullin]

London Invitational Tournament, Broomfield Park (results)

Previous results:

London Invitational Tournament 2004  1. Mr. Michael Webb  2. Jon Angel  3. Will Eagar

London Invitational Tournament 2003  1. Will Eagar  2. Mr. Michael Webb  3. Graham Southern

London Invitational Tournament 2002 (Hastings) 1. Graham Southern  2. Jon Angel  3. Scott Coe

Open only to London Minigolf Club members. 

Tim Davies says:
London players only, enough said.

1) K. Kellard  2) Mr M Webb 3) W Eagar

Ted McIver says:
??

Steve Gow says:
1) L Bender, 2) S Gow, 3) W Eagar

Keith Kellard says:
Depends upon format adopted for this comp, but if the same as 2004, Jon Angel will take his second title. But it will be close - expect the course record to go!
1.Jon Angel 2.Keith Kellard 3.Mr Michael Webb

[Result:  1) K Kellard  2) Jon Angel 3) Will Eagar]

Hastings Invitational Tournament (details)  (results)

Previous results:  

2004  1. Tim Davies  2. Ted McIver  3. Ruth Bullin

2003  1. Tim Davies  2. Ted McIver  3. Peter Parr

2002  1. Tim Davies  2. Ted McIver  3. Peter Parr

Tim Davies says:
It'll be a breeze and a strong one at that. Another new format, same old winner
1) T Davies 2) J McIver 3) R Bullin

Ted McIver says:
1) T Davies 2) J McIver 3) P Parr same as last year

Steve Gow says:
1) T Davies, 2) P Parr, 3) B Bullin

Keith Kellard says:
Tim to win by virtue of knowing the courses better
1. Tim Davies 2. John McIver 3. Ruth Bullin 

[Result:  1) T Davies  2) J McIver  3) B Bullin]

British Masters Tournament, Southend (results)

Previous results:  

2004  1. Ted McIver  2. Jon Angel  3. Keith Kellard

2003  1. Tim Davies 2. Jo Vallory  3. Ted McIver 

2002  1. Ted McIver  2. Mr. Michael Webb  3. Tim Davies

2001  1. Robert Vallory  2. Ted McIver  3. Tim Davies

2000  1. Robert Vallory  2.Jo Vallory  3. Peter Parr 

BMGA course record: 37 Ted McIver

Tim Davies says:
For the sixth year in succession the Adventure Island course will hold the British Masters, previous form should hold the key. If it's wet look for a new course record.
1) T Davies 2) J McIver 3) Mr. M Webb

Ted McIver says:
A disappointing turn out last year to win the famed jacket-with Davies in lava hot form the BMGA members may as well have a few extra drinks on Friday night and a lie in on the Saturday.
1)Davies 2)Angel 3)Webb

Steve Gow says:
1) T Davies, 2) S Gow, 3) Ruth Bullin

Keith Kellard says:
Southend is a relatively unknown course compared to Hastings/Broomfield Park/Stratford and one where technique plays a greater part. As the scene of probably still my best performance, 2005 will see me taking this as my first title.
1. Keith Kellard 2. John McIver 3. Tim Davies

[Result: 1) J McIver 2) T Davies 3) R Dent]

London Open, Broomfield Park (results)

Previous competitions held on this course include the BMGA players championship and two rounds of the Club Championship.

Previous results:  

London Invitational 2005 1. K Kellard  2. Jon Angel 3. Will Eagar

London Open 2004 1. Will Eagar 2= Mr. Michael Webb 2= Bill Bullin

London Invitational 2004 1. Mr. Michael Webb 2. Jon Angel  3. Will Eagar

London Open 2003 1. Peter Parr  2= Tim Davies 2= Mr. Michael Webb

London Invitational 2003 1. Will Eagar 2. Mr. Michael Webb 3. Graham Southern

Club Championship 2002: 1. Mr. Michael Webb  2. Peter Parr  3. Tim Davies

BMGA players championship 2002  1. Lionel Bender  2. Tim Davies  3. Mr. Michael Webb

BMGA players championship 2000  1. Tim Davies  2. Robert Vallory  3. Lionel Bender

BMGA course record: Will Eagar, Tim Davies, Jon Angel 36.

Tim Davies says:
I think I'll take a leaf out of the London players books and not bother to attend. 

Ted McIver says:
Peter Parr picks up his putter-but will he slay the welsh dragon? Unfortunately due to family commitments we'll never find out
1)parr 2)Eagar 3)Angel 

Steve Gow says:
1) T Davies, 2) K Kellard, 3) W Eagar

Keith Kellard says:
Another tricky one to call. If Will Eagar turns up he may win. If Tim turns up, he may win. But I reckon on Mr Michael Webb again. And expect the course record to go!
1. Mr Michael Webb 2. Jon Angel 3. Brad Shepherd

[Result: 1) S Vallory 2) P Parr 3) B Shepherd]

British Open International Minigolf Tournament, Clambers, Hastings (results)

Previous results: 

British Championships 1. Mr M Webb 2. J Angel 3. T Davies

British Open 2003 1. Christian Zimmermann  2. Tim Davies 3. Ted McIver

Hastings Invitational Tournament 2003 1. Tim Davies  2.Ted McIver 3. Peter Parr

British Championship 2002  1. Ted McIver  2. Tim Davies 3. Dan Davies

Hastings Invitational Tournament 2002 1. Tim Davies  2.Ted McIver 3. Peter Parr

Club Championships 2002  1. Ted McIver  2. Tim Davies  3. Peter Parr

BMGA players championship 2001  1. Tim Davies  2. Peter Parr  3. Robert Vallory

British Championship 2001  1. Ted McIver  2. Peter Parr 3. Tim Davies

British Championship 2000  1. Tim Davies  2. Steve Vallory  3. Andy Miller

BMGA record 28, Tim Davies

Tim Davies says:
I'm still puzzled with last years result. Ted and I were awful.
1) T Davies 2) J McIver 3) Mr. M Webb

Ted McIver says:
Home advantage will count in September and many many months of practice.
1) a European 2) T Davies 3)another European 4)a european with facial hair

Steve Gow says:
1) T Davies, 2) W Eagar, 3) B Shepherd

Keith Kellard says:
Clambers - Depends on which overseas players make the trip, but I expect the top 3 British places to be:
1. Tim Davies 2. Jon Angel 3. Mr Michael Webb

[Result: 1. Jouni Valkjärvi  2. Mirko Caselin  3. Toni Rantala]

Welsh Open, Llandudno ??  Didn't happen

Tim Davies says:
This is the one I really want to win, if I'm allowed to go I will win it - Cymru am Byth.
1) T Davies 2) J McIver 3) P Parr

Ted McIver says:
I have no idea what this course is like-but that won't stop me from talking knowledgeably on the subject. 2005 form continues with Webb boosted by his first tournament successes starts to gain a psychological edge over Davies - Eagar takes advantage to beat Davies to second place - Shameful Tim Shameful, especially in the home of your forefathers
1) M Webb 2) W Eagar 3) T Davies

Steve Gow says:
1) T Davies, 2) P Parr, 3) B Bullin

Keith Kellard says:
Tim wants to win this one. He won't! It's a new course. I'll have it!
1. Keith Kellard 2. Tim Davies 3. Jon Angel 

Poole

Tim Davies says:
Looks like a tough course and judging from what I've heard it is. I haven't played there before but that wont stop me winning it.
1) T Davies 2) J McIver 3) P Parr

Ted McIver says:
1)Davies 2)Eagar 3)Angel
He has never played the course but that won't stop him getting the course record

Steve Gow says:
1) J Angel, 2) K Kellard, 3) B Bullin

Keith Kellard says:
Let's hope we play here in 2005, it's a fantastic course. Tim will win, the course will suit him.
1. Tim Davies 2. Will Eagar 3. Keith Kellard 

BMGA Players Championship (results)

Tim Davies says: Done this lots so one more win should sour a few more faces.
1) T Davies 2) J McIver 3) K Kellard

Ted McIver says:
1)Davies 2)Angel 3)vallory
the third time TIM wins

Steve Gow says:
1) J Mciver, 2) L Bender, 3) B Shepherd

Keith Kellard says:
Hopefully this will be played in matchplay format like in 2004, and if so could provide some interesting results. Home advantage if played at Clambers will count for a lot, so I'll give it to Ted by a whisker.
1. John McIver 2. Tim Davies 3. Bill Bullin 

[Result: 1. J McIver  2. T Davies  3. B Bullin]

British Club Championships (results)

Previous results:

2004 1. London Minigolf Club A 2. Planet Hastings Crazy Golf Club 3.Welwyn Garden City

2003 1. London Minigolf Club  2. Planet Hastings Crazy Golf Club

2002 1. Planet Hastings Crazy Golf Club  2. London Minigolf Club

Tim Davies says:
Who cares? And I mean that sincerely.
1) Hastings  2) London  3) anyone else

Ted McIver says:
At the midlands-I predict the midlands will surprise a few people 
1)London a 2)Midlands 3)astings 4)Welling garden 5)London B
Davies can't do it all and watches in horror as Johnny Angel lifts the trophy for the third year running.

Steve Gow says:
1) London A, 2) London B, 3) Hastings

Keith Kellard says:
No contest
1. London A 2. Planet Hastings 3. London B

[Result: 1. Planet Hastings Crazy Golf Club  2. Midlands  3. London Minigolf Club A]

European Club championships

Tim Davies says:
I doubt London will go, if they do they'll come a resounding last.

World Championships, Steyr, Austria  (results) (European 2004 results) (World 2003 results) (European 2002 results)

incorporating the English Open (2004 results) (2003 results) (2002 results)

The forecast will only involve British players.

BMGA Eternit course record: 24 Tim Davies & Mr. Michael Webb. 

BMGA Beton course record: 34 P Parr & Mr. Michael Webb. 

Tim Davies says:
Tim's forecast: 1) Tim Davies  2) Mr. Michael Webb  3) Keith Kellard
Teams: Men 1) Germany 2) Sweden 3) Austria
Teams: Women 1) Germany 2) Sweden 3) Austria.  

Ted McIver says:
Last year in Timisoara the British team missed the warmth, direction and team spirit that Davies and Parr bring. The Woods and Mickelson of mini golf expect more insults to be dropped than shots in this tournament
1)Webb 2)Parr 3)Davies
expect the president to get the last laugh though. 

Steve Gow says:
1) M Webb, 2) J Angel, 3) K Kellard

Keith Kellard says:
Michael can play eternit well. The rest of us can't. Yet!
1. Mr Michael Webb 2. Keith Kellard 3. Tim Davies
  

British Championships, Stratford (results)

Previous results: 

British Open 2004 1. Thierry Cruybeeck  2. Tim Davies 3. Ted McIver

British Minigolf Championships 2003 1. Ted McIver  2. Tim Davies  3. Mr. M Webb

BMGA National Minigolf Open 2002 1. Jon Drexler (US)  2. Ted McIver  3. Tim Davies  4. Lionel Bender

BMGA course record: Tim Davies & Will Eagar 32.

The forecast will only involve British players.

Tim Davies says:
Hmm, I might have other things on my mind but if I can stay focused not even a tent will come between me and my birthright!  
Tim's forecast: 1. Tim Davies  2. Ted McIver  3. Will Eagar

Ted McIver says:
Nick Berry sang every loser wins-not in minigolf pally - every loser keeps on losing as Davies keeps on winning
1)Davies 2)Angel 3)Kellard 

Steve Gow says:
1) M Webb, 2) J Angel, 3) K Kellard

Keith Kellard says:
Can I give myself another title for 2005? Why not. I should've done better in 2004, but the format is different for the Open & Championship, so I won't have to play a fourth round!
1. Keith Kellard 2. Tim Davies 3. John McIver 

[Result: 1) J Angel  2) B Shepherd  3) C Harding]

British Women's Championship (as part of above)

Tim Davies says:
Ruth will walk it.

[Result: 1. Ruth Bullin ]

British Senior's Championship (as part of above) (results)

Previous results: 

2004 1. L Bender 2. B Bullin 3. R Bullin

2003 1. B Bullin 2. R Bullin 3. C Harley

Tim Davies says:
My first year as a senior, my first seniors victory.  No, I'm not eligible - forecast altered accordingly!
1) R Bullin 2) B Bullin 3) L Bender

Steve Gow says:
1) L Bender, 2) B Bullin, 3) Ruth Bullin

Keith Kellard says:
Tim to win on home soil
1. Tim Davies 2. Ruth Bullin 3. Lionel Bender 

[Result: 1. Tim Davies 2. Ruth Bullin 3. R Vallory]

British Junior's Championship (as part of above) (results)

Tim Davies says:
Between Rocky and Tom Tribe.
1) R Bullin 2) T Tribe

Steve Gow says:
1) Rocky  

[Result: 1) R Bullin  2) M Vallory  3) J Howsen ]

World Crazy Golf Championships (results)

Previous results:

2004 1. Tim Davies  2. Ted McIver  3. Peter Emmerson

2003 1. Tim Davies  2. Ted McIver  3. Olivia Prokopova

Seafront Crazy Golf  BMGA record 32, Brad Shepherd, Ted McIver & Tim Davies

Seafront mini golf BMGA record 33, Tim Davies

Tim Davies says:
I played well last year, proper preparation even if somewhat limited.  McIver prepared by chasing a dream in Moldova the week before.  I'm sure I can shave a few more shots off both courses, so look for course records on both.
Tim's forecast: 1. Tim Davies  2. Ted McIver  3. Mr. Michael Webb

Ted McIver says:
Practice practice practice, notes notes notes, dull dull dull
1)Tim tiddles 2)McIver 3)Kellard

Steve Gow says:
1) J McIver, 2) W Eagar, 3) B Shepherd

Keith Kellard says:
No change from 2004 here, except I'll actually finish in third place. Davies to walk it again - home advantage counts for a lot.
1. Tim Davies 2. John McIver 3. Keith Kellard

[Result: 1) T Davies  2) O Prokopova  3) P Aho]